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Q: I’m 98 years old and spend many hours thinking of my past since I now know the Lord as my Savior. I need help and assurance that I’m truly forgiven.
I became pregnant when I was “date raped” as a teenager, and due to pressure from my family I had an abortion. I wasn’t strong enough at the time to say no. After a few years, I tried to forget.
Eventually, I became a Christian. I love the Lord, and was finally able to forgive the man who raped me. I got married to a fine man but had no family.
Now, Pastor, I’m not able to forgive myself for the abortion. Like King David, “my sin is ever before me.” Is there any hope for me? Can I be forgiven?
Asked by: Caroline, Michigan
A: Well my dear sister, here you are at the age of 98 still thinking of the sins of your youth.
You know, isn’t it just like the devil to take our past and to throw it in our faces, particularly when we know that we don’t have a lot of time left. And he wants to win some kind of a victory in your life before you die.
But I do have a question for you. Is the blood of Jesus Christ, God’s Son, able to cleanse you from all sin? I believe that the answer to that is resoundingly yes. What you are really listening to are accusations that come, I think, from the devil, who wants you to die as one who is not dying victoriously. Don’t listen to those voices.
Caroline, when my father was 100 years old, he mentioned to my mother the very same situation, how Satan was throwing up his past before him and he kept praying for forgiveness. But my mother very wisely said, “this is not a time to pray for forgiveness, this is a time to thank God for forgiveness and to accept Christ’s sacrifice as totally sufficient for the past, blotting out the past and wiping it out, so that we can go into heaven with a clean slate and Jesus as our Savior.”
This is a moment when you must exercise faith in all that God has promised about His forgiveness and His grace—and stand in those promises.
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