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Question 29

Q: Hopeless and helpless is how I’m feeling right now. The devil is using my mind as a playground.

My emotions are like a ball being bounced back and forth; between belief and unbelief, and all this is being done with no consent on my part.

I was a terrible sinner when I was young, but I’ve asked God, through the blood of His Son Jesus, to wash my heart clean. Today, I’m anxiety ridden, even though I read my Bible and pray.

I believe in the power of God, but I feel helpless against what the enemy of my soul is trying to do to my mind. 

I have 2 wonderful daughters, 5 grandchildren and 3 great grand kids. I’m 74 years old and need a miracle from God more than I have ever needed one. I have two grandchildren who struggle with ADD and some speech problems; they have a stepdad who gives them a roof over their heads and food on the table, but they live in the middle of hell. He has no love for daughter and my grandchildren and shows it daily.

Oh, how much we need God’s help to break this vicious cycle.

Asked by: Nancy, Ohio

A: Nancy, I can’t help but feel deep sympathy and pain for you.

Imagine these grandchildren with special challenges and a stepdad who doesn’t love them and apparently shows them hate!

First of all, you need to have a long talk with your daughter. She’s really the key in all of this. I hope that she’s giving the children a sense of stability and love, even if her husband isn’t. So would you pray about that? Ask God how you can minister to your daughter, and maybe together pray and seek God regarding a solution.

Second, it’s very important for you to find friends who are willing to pray with you—and for you. I really do believe that God is honored when we pray together. There’s something about being bound together in Christ—as we cry up on behalf of one another’s problems and needs—and God delights to answer those kinds of prayers.

Now, one of the questions I have is, “has anyone talked to the step dad about his attitude and the way in which he treats his stepchildren?” Men sometimes are very blind to how deeply they are hurting others. They’re blind to all that’s going on because they have their own issues. Who knows the kind of pain that he brought into his own life through his family and so forth? Invite your pastor to sit down with him. He needs to see that he’s hurting his precious step-children.

Also, it’s so important for you to continue receiving counsel, and I think that you should have someone monitor the family—someone you respect, someone who loves all of you—and you need to trust and you need to believe.

And so finally, Nancy, you need to show your grandchildren the kind of love and acceptance and wholeness that they so desperately need. I hope that when those children grow up, they will be able to say, “I had a grandmother who really loved us and cared about us. And in the midst of our pain, she was an island of hope.”

Don’t add to the burdens of your family with a critical spirit; rather be a beacon of hope who is welcomed by your family. I pray that God will grant you the strength to do that. And stay close to a body of believers who can walk with you on life’s journey.

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