I’ve been married 20 years and have two small children. In the past few years, we’ve fallen into debt. and so

I spent a great deal of time away from home to make money to help get us back on our feet. Even my wife began working.

But now that we’re doing better, she wants out of the marriage because she feels I neglected her emotionally during these past years, which is true because I was focused on getting us out of debt.

What troubles me is that she wants to put space between us. She wants to get out of the home to “find herself.” I’m afraid of what this might mean because she’s been corresponding on the internet with a man she dated before we were married. She says she’s helping him with his issues. I’m afraid the old relationship might be revived. What do I do? She won’t go for marriage counseling, and she’s very defensive about all of this and her decision to want to leave me.

I’ve been married for about six years and my husband and I have a four-year-old daughter. Early on in our relationship, my husband became depressed then verbally abusive. He wouldn’t say anything unless it was to yell at me.

We’re separated now, and I’m living with my parents because we fear he could turn violent. He wants to get the family back together, and I do love him, but I can’t trust him. He spends very little time with our daughter, and what confuses me more is that there are times when he’s a wonderful husband and father. He seems to be two different people.

We’ve been to counseling, but now he doesn’t want to continue because, “we’ve tried it and it doesn’t work.” Both of us are Christians, but I can’t live with my parents forever. What should I do?